As a Afro-Dominican, immigrant, and first-generation woman in law school, I feel that imposter syndrome and law school go hand-in-hand. Reflecting on the past two years of law school, I realize the feeling of not belonging or not being “smart enough” has plagued me from the very beginning. And for the record, it has absolutely nothing to do with my 145 LSAT score. Quite frankly, I’ve never cared about that standardized test score. I always knew the LSAT could never measure my excellence or academic promise. Instead, my grit and hustle (as I knew it would) have determined my success in law school.
I didn’t walk into law school with imposter syndrome, rather, I was very excited and proud of my achievements. Imposter syndrome trickled in within the first few weeks of law school. I struggled with the voluminous amounts of readings. To make it worse, it felt like I was decoding Latin and not fully engaging with the material. That then translated into a fear of being called on. (Law schools should abolish the Socratic method, it breeds anxiety and makes law school that much worse of an experience. But that’s tea for another day).
Anyways, my fear of being called on wasn’t only due to the readings, but also because I was stunned by the eloquence of speech my White peers exhibited. I remember thinking, “omg, I don’t sound like that. My professor and classmates are definitely going to think I’m dumb.” The fear of being looked upon as “dumb” fed my imposter syndrome and led to me experiencing full-on anxiety attacks throughout 1L.
I was so engulfed in my anxiety and imposter syndrome that I couldn’t see how well I was actually doing in my classes. To combat my imposter syndrome, I began meeting with professors and Teacher Assistants on a weekly basis to go over the readings and ensure I was analyzing the cases correctly. This helped calm my anxiety tremendously as I no longer feared being called on. I was also vocal about my experiences with my BIPOC friends. It was reassuring knowing that we were all going through the same thing and had each other to rely on. Lastly, I prayed, journaled, and said my affirmations often.
I had to continuously remind myself that I was worthy of the position I was in, how hard I had worked to obtain it, and that absolutely no one could rob me of what God deemed was for me. And of course, my boyfriend, friends, and family hyping me up did the trick. Shoutout to them for keeping me grounded.
All that to say, the best way to overcome imposter syndrome is to rebuild the very confidence law school strips you of. I’m now a 2L and hunny, imposter syndrome where?! It occasionally tries to make an appearance, but I shut it down quick because who has time for that?! Not I. I’m much more confident in my academic abilities and have made peace with the inner voice that freaks out when my White peers speak in class. I’m proud of my legal jargon mixed with slang and a dash of swag. They don’t make them like me baby! And that gift is what is going to allow me to move in-and-out of rooms others could never.
Law school was never made with us in mind. Black, Latinx, Indigenous, Women, alla dat! But every day you must show up and claim your seat. You belong. You are worthy. That J.D. is yours for the taking!
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